Discouraged

I am not sure if this is the correct feeling. How do you explain what it feels like to believe you are following God's direction and then it doesn't quite work out? Let me explain...

We are members of a mega-church. We have been involved in large churches before and we know that the best way to meet people is to serve and get into a small group - women's, couples, etc. This is how the church feels smaller. We have a fully functioning coffee shop on our new campus. I am actually not much of a coffee drinker, but serving at Cafe 5000 helps me grow that serving muscle. It isn't a hard job, but necessary.

Last night I went to an event designed to help women interested in finding a group. My spiritual gifts are administration and shepherding. This seems to be a good fit for leading small groups. I can organize fairly well and led small groups in college. In fact, this was one of my best memories of college life - I am still friends with most of the people in that group.

I say all of this to say that I left last nights event without a small group. I really felt like I was following God's lead. And now I am wondering if I wasn't listening. What is getting in the way that I am not able to find a group of christian women that I connect with? Should I not try and lead a group but just be a participant? I have a desire to use my gifts, but what is the best way to do that?

I am struggling with God to figure out the next step. I automatically blame myself. What is wrong with me? But is is something else? The time and day that I want to meet (Sat am)? The original design of the event (not really designed for introverts - lots of mingling)? My mind and heart is in turmoil!

Please pray and leave me any thoughts you might have that would help shine some light on this experience.

Blessings.