Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Discouraged

I am not sure if this is the correct feeling. How do you explain what it feels like to believe you are following God's direction and then it doesn't quite work out? Let me explain...

We are members of a mega-church. We have been involved in large churches before and we know that the best way to meet people is to serve and get into a small group - women's, couples, etc. This is how the church feels smaller. We have a fully functioning coffee shop on our new campus. I am actually not much of a coffee drinker, but serving at Cafe 5000 helps me grow that serving muscle. It isn't a hard job, but necessary.

Last night I went to an event designed to help women interested in finding a group. My spiritual gifts are administration and shepherding. This seems to be a good fit for leading small groups. I can organize fairly well and led small groups in college. In fact, this was one of my best memories of college life - I am still friends with most of the people in that group.

I say all of this to say that I left last nights event without a small group. I really felt like I was following God's lead. And now I am wondering if I wasn't listening. What is getting in the way that I am not able to find a group of christian women that I connect with? Should I not try and lead a group but just be a participant? I have a desire to use my gifts, but what is the best way to do that?

I am struggling with God to figure out the next step. I automatically blame myself. What is wrong with me? But is is something else? The time and day that I want to meet (Sat am)? The original design of the event (not really designed for introverts - lots of mingling)? My mind and heart is in turmoil!

Please pray and leave me any thoughts you might have that would help shine some light on this experience.

Blessings.

4 comments:

Cheri said...

Oh, please, come be part of my group. We could even co-facilitate! We do meet Wednesday evenings, but we provide dinner - yes dinner!

I think the commute would be challenging each week, but I am sure we could work soemthing out.

Or not.

Liza's Eyeview said...

I don't have much to say .. just keep an open heart, and God will speak. Sometimes his timing is not ours...

I am confident the Holy Spirit will show you the way .. hang in there. I'd say a prayer for you.

Connie@Little Red Hearts From God said...

I have been right where you are..

in those silent moments.. do not jump ahead of God but "Be still and know" Psalm 46:10

He will let you know when it's time. He is not ready to show you. Sometimes it's ok to not know..
Pray and listen..

Read 1 kings 19:11-12 http://littleredheartfromgod.blogspot.com/2007/09/but-through-his-gentle-whispers.html

I hope this helps....

God's right there with you....wait on HIS voice

Susanne said...

Oh I hear ya. Praying for you that the Lord shows you exactly where you are to fit. And there is somewhere He's got in mind. Don't lose heart.